“Expectation is the mother of all frustration.”
What do you expect from your children? I know at times when my children were young I expected way too much. I asked them to do things that they were not capable of and then I got frustrated, and angry, and annoyed when they did not meet those expectations. Although at the time I thought they were the problem, in reality, I was the problem. I needed to think more clearly about what they could do and what they were not capable of doing. I needed to make sure that they clearly understood the expectations that I had. I needed to think and to pause before I showed them my frustration and anger and annoyance.
Just like snowflakes, every child is unique and special. No two are exactly the same and yet as a parent I sometimes, somehow overlooked this. My expectations for different children were sometimes the same and that is what led to my frustration and to theirs as well. It would have been so much easier and so much more successful had I taken into account each of their unique personalities all of the time.
I am not advocating throwing out all expectations. Expectations are good for children. It gives them a goal, something to strive for and it clarifies for them what we want them to do. We just have to make sure that our expectations are realistic, attainable and have the best interests of that particular child in mind.
So…if you want to have less frustration in your life with your children, take a good hard look at you expectations. Are they age appropriate? Is this particular child able to meet those expectations? Do they make sense to the child? Are they presented in a clear and understandable way? Ask these question first and I know that your house will see a lot less frustrating moments.
Have some fun today!